Ask Johnny: How Much Grace Should You Give a Struggling Employee?

SHRM President and Chief Executive Officer Johnny C. Taylor, Jr., SHRM-SCP, answers your workplace questions each week. Do you have a work-related question you’d like him to answer? Submit it here.

I manage someone who has always been a strong performer, but lately their work has slipped because of serious personal issues. I want to be compassionate, but the rest of the team is starting to feel the impact. How do I support them without lowering expectations or hurting team morale, and where do I draw the line between compassion and accountability? —Shreya

One of the biggest misconceptions about leadership is that empathy and accountability are somehow at odds. They're not. In fact, the best leaders understand you can't effectively lead without both. Employees deserve compassion when life becomes difficult, but they also deserve clear expectations. Those two things can, and should, coexist.

When a high-performing employee suddenly begins struggling, don't jump to conclusions. Start with a conversation. Not a performance discussion, but a genuine check-in. If an employee is dealing with significant personal challenges, your role isn't to solve those problems or become their counselor. People don't need you to fix every problem. They need to know you see them as a human being. Make sure they're aware of the resources your organization provides, whether that's paid time off, leave under the Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA), an employee assistance program (EAP), or other available benefits.

Once you've had that conversation, establish a shared understanding of what comes next. If the employee needs time away or another workplace accommodation that's available to them, help them access it. If they tell you they're able to continue working, it's reasonable to expect them to fulfill the essential responsibilities of the role. Grace may influence how you manage the situation, but it shouldn't eliminate accountability.

Your responsibility also extends beyond one employee. You owe fairness to the entire team. If one person's workload consistently becomes everyone else's burden, morale and trust will eventually suffer. While you should always respect the employee's privacy, don't ignore the impact on the rest of the team. Strong leaders support individuals without creating lasting inequities for everyone else.

If performance doesn't improve despite reasonable support and the resources available to the employee, it's appropriate to return to your organization's normal performance management process. Performance expectations shouldn't disappear simply because someone is facing personal challenges. Once you've offered appropriate support, it's important to continue managing performance with clarity, consistency, and respect.

Leadership isn't about choosing between compassion and accountability. It's about having the wisdom to practice both. The managers employees trust most are the ones who genuinely care about their people while helping them meet the standards that allow both the individual and the team to succeed.