5 Ways HR Can Unlock Civility in the Workplace

The key to combating incivility in the workplace is taking a deliberate and strategic approach to organizational culture, said Catherine Mattice, SHRM-SCP, founder and CEO of Civility Partners Inc., during a session at SHRM25 in San Diego.

Incivility costs U.S. organizations about $2 billion a day through lost productivity and increased absenteeism, according to the SHRM Q2 2025 Civility Index. Stress, polarization, burnout, and toxic behavior contribute to 8.3 million acts of incivility across the country every hour. 

But HR departments have tremendous power to curb incivility in the workplace by encouraging a healthy culture that values respect. Mattice outlined several practical strategies for HR leaders to create healthier and more productive workplace environments.

Discover Your True Workplace Culture

Workplace culture is not determined by the values on a company website, and it’s not set by the CEO, Mattice said. Instead, it’s shaped by the behaviors tolerated, rewarded, and exemplified in the workplace every day.

“Culture is the way your workforce understands the world around them, and how they behave as a result of that understanding,” she explained. “So culture exists in the mind of the people who work with you.” 

Mattice introduced a framework of seven questions HR departments should ask to understand their culture as employees experience it:

• What are our organization’s stated core values? 
• What are the core values of the people who work here, as shown through their actions?
• What are the rules and norms? 
• Who are the company heroes?
• What type of language and symbols do we use?  
• What stories and histories are retold?
• What ceremonies and rituals do we have? 

If the stated core values from the first question don’t align with the behaviors observed in the subsequent questions, the organization has a culture problem, which often leads to incivility and toxic behavior. 

For example, an organization’s stated core values might include respect. However, if the people celebrated within the organization engage in disrespectful behavior, then respect isn’t truly an organizational value. “The values aren’t describing the culture. This company hero is describing the culture,” Mattice said. 

Toolkit: How to Build a Strong Organizational Culture

Create OIL Alignment for a Healthy Culture 

Mattice said workplace culture operates on three levels:

• Organizational 
• Individual
• Leadership 

When there’s a mismatch in priorities between these three areas, which she calls the OIL levels, it encourages toxicity. “Every time I go into a toxic workplace, it’s because these three things don’t align,” she said. 

The key to attaining OIL alignment, Mattice explained, lies in setting clear behavioral expectations, ensuring systems and processes exist to support desired behaviors, and allocating resources accordingly. “What they put resources toward is a huge indicator of your culture,” she said. “Then the organization is acknowledging and rewarding the individuals behaving in the right ways.” 

Make the Case for Addressing Toxic Behaviors

HR departments often feel hemmed in by the letter of the law when evaluating problematic behavior, Mattice said. Instead, HR professionals should assess the alignment between the organization’s actions, leadership’s behavior, and individual employee behaviors and feel empowered to act when something isn’t right.  

While disrespectful behavior isn’t illegal, neither is showing up late for work. Yet, organizations often feel more comfortable policing attendance than toxic behavior, she noted. Both need to be addressed because both interfere with work being done. 

An organization’s leadership is sometimes reluctant to address an employee’s toxic behavior when the employee is a top performer because they’re not aware of the costs, Mattice said. HR needs to make a business case for addressing a high-performing employee’s poor behavior and approach the discussion armed with facts.  

Explain to your leadership how an individual’s behavior is causing increased turnover and lower productivity, which are costing the company money. “On a profit and loss statement, we can see things like payroll, the cost of a trainer, and a consultant to fix something. We don’t see the cost of turnover, the real cost of lost productivity,” she said. “It does make sense, though, that if people don’t feel good, they’re not working as hard. They’re not giving you quality work.”

If all of that isn’t enough, Mattice pointed out that “lawful but awful” actions such as microaggressions, teasing, and incivility can escalate into illegal actions including harassment, discrimination, and even violence if left unchecked. Point out to leadership that stopping toxic workplace behavior now can prevent a hostile work environment that could provide the grounds for future legal action, she said. 

Train Managers to Lead Culture Change

Managers play a pivotal role in shaping workplace culture, Mattice said, but many are ill-equipped to lead culture effectively. “Culture doesn’t come from the top CEO or a mission statement. It comes from the way teams interact every day, and that’s shaped by managers,” she explained. 

But about two-thirds of workers who experienced incivility (66%) said their manager could have done more to prevent it, according to the SHRM Q2 2025 Civility Index. Managers can also directly contribute to incivility in the workplace, Mattice said, and can even cause turnover if they’re not properly trained.

Organizations should clarify the role that managers play in promoting a healthy workplace culture and addressing toxic behavior, Mattice said. Establish clear expectations for how managers should contribute to a positive work culture. Ensure that the organization’s systems and processes are established to support their involvement in shaping the culture. Finally, assess the tools managers will need to do this work and create a plan for how managers will acquire the necessary skills.

“Your managers need tools to proactively build a positive, thriving environment,” Mattice said. “They need tools to coach somebody who’s gossiping, who’s being uncivil, who’s constantly interrupting people in the staff meetings.” 

SHRM People Manager Qualification (PMQ)

Hold Toxic Employees Accountable 

HR must establish accountability for toxic behavior, which begins with helping employees understand the consequences of their behavior. A toxic employee’s behavior usually isn’t driven by cruelty. Instead, they are generally motivated by some combination of a desire to appear competent, anxiety about making mistakes, and a lack of empathy. Mattice said that in her experience, many toxic employees don’t fully realize the effect their actions have on others.

Feedback is essential to correcting the problem, but HR must avoid being drawn into a debate about exactly what happened or whether or not the employee’s actions were justified. Instead, feedback should focus on how the employee’s behavior was perceived, and further action needs to focus on changing those perceptions. 

A toxic employee can create lasting change in their behavior, Mattice said, but only if the employee receives regular progress checks and faces real consequences for failing to change how they are perceived. Consequences don’t always have to mean termination, she clarified. Tailored solutions could include suspension from high-visibility responsibilities, loss of perks, or withholding promotions until an individual demonstrates lasting change.

SHRM Specialty Credential: Workplace Investigations

Change Is Possible

Civility at work reflects purposeful leadership and intentional culture building. For HR professionals, driving such change requires more than policies on a page; it demands aligning actions, priorities, and values across every level of the organization. By addressing toxic behaviors, empowering managers, and ensuring accountability, HR can create a positive and productive workplace culture. 

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