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Ask HR: What's the Best Way to Deal with an Overbearing Co-Worker?




SHRM President and Chief Executive Officer Johnny C. Taylor, Jr., SHRM-SCP, is answering HR questions as part of a series for USA Today.

Do you have an HR or work-related question you'd like him to answer? Submit it here. 

 

A co-worker in an adjacent department has been problematic. He often talks over people in meetings and tries to dominate the agenda. My department often collaborates with him, so our manager has little influence over his behavior. It is to the point where people frequently avoid scheduled meetings with him, which really only cedes more power to him. How can we best address his overbearing behavior? —Karl  

Johnny C. Taylor, Jr.: I'm sorry to hear you are having difficulty with a co-worker. You may have more influence than you think. Discuss the issue with your manager and suggest setting ground rules for your meetings if you have not already. Some meeting organizers will list rules on the agenda or meeting invitations, so everyone knows the expectations.

As a meeting organizer, you can start by requiring participants to raise their hands during meetings if anyone has something to share. You could do this virtually on many videoconferencing platforms or in person, giving the meeting organizer more control over the conversation and allowing everyone to share their ideas.

Another rule could be that one person speaks at a time. You or someone on your team could interrupt your co-worker if that person starts talking over people. I know it seems counterintuitive and goes against what most of us learned growing up, but there's a way to do it without being rude. You can reiterate the rule of one person speaking at a time to capture everyone's input. You could also politely say something like, "I really want to hear what you have to say but want to let Amy finish her thoughts first, and then we can come back to you."

Additionally, you could set time limits for each agenda item. Having time limits in place can help keep the conversation on track and gives the meeting organizer agency to cut off your co-worker if he begins dominating the conversation.

Other good rules to apply are arriving on time; putting away laptops or phones; and, most importantly, being respectful.

The simplest way of addressing your co-worker's overbearing behavior, though, is for someone to talk with him directly. He might not be aware that he's doing it or that his actions are bothersome. If you feel comfortable, have the conversation, but refrain from making your comments personal or turning the conversation into an attack on his character. If you are not comfortable with this option, talk to your manager. Perhaps they can connect with his manager to have a discussion. Either way, the focus should be on his behavior and its impact on the team.

If these steps do not help, speak with human resources about your concerns. Often, they can work with managers to devise a game plan if an employee is disrupting work. HR can also partner with management to help foster a more productive and positive work environment.

Best of luck to you! 


I work for an engineering design firm. We recently laid off 15 percent of our unit staff but have not adjusted our performance targets. Should I approach our unit manager about the implications of the layoffs on our goals? Shouldn't they already be aware? —Samir

Johnny C. Taylor, Jr.: Layoffs are an unfortunate reality of business, especially amid economic slowdowns like the current one. Often, organizations underestimate how layoffs impact the workers who remain. Managers should be aware of and develop a plan for achieving performance goals before and after layoffs. However, setting the targets may sometimes be difficult if decisions on shifting roles and responsibilities still need to be finalized. You also may have yet to hear about them, because they may want to include the remaining employees in the process of adjusting those goals. 

The success of any organization is due to individual contributors and management. Your questions may help your manager remain on track and develop or communicate the plan moving forward. Have a candid conversation with your manager about your concerns regarding workload and achieving goals with a reduced workforce. 

While I am not familiar with the details of your workplace, there are some basic questions to consider for your discussion:

  • Are there new goals for us now that there have been layoffs?
  • Will the workload or goals be adjusted?
  • Is there a communication plan?
  • What are the organization's strategic plan, solvency and next steps that may help fortify team members and increase their commitment to the organization?
  • What tools or resources are available to help with the workload?
  • Are there training opportunities to help limit the gap?

If you have ideas about positively impacting any of these areas, be sure to share them with your manager. Layoffs are always challenging for everyone in an organization. Hopefully, you and your team can better understand the plan forward by having a conversation with your manager. Successfully surviving a layoff requires flexibility, communication and support from all parties.

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