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Treat Others with Courtesy by Practicing Civility on Campus

August 2, 2024

Learning how to navigate a college campus, create a class schedule from a myriad of options, and live away from your family are among the many challenges students face.

Another challenge: How to interact with other students who are different from you, with different viewpoints and ways of responding to the world. It can be easy to be told to practice civility, but what does that look like to a college or university student?

Five types of incivility include:

  1. Disrespectful behavior. Talking over others; interrupting an instructor, coach, or classmate; and making derogatory remarks are all examples of rude conversational practices.
  2. Bullying and harassment. This can take the form of targeted verbal attacks or excluding someone based on their race, gender, sexual orientation, or other personal characteristics.
  3. Microaggressions. These are subtle, often unintentional behaviors or comments that sound hostile or insulting toward people in marginalized groups, such as comments about someone’s accent or making assumptions about another person’s background.
  4. Hostile environment. These can include conflicts with a roommate escalating into personal attacks, vandalizing personal property, or creating an uncomfortable living situation.
  5. Online behavior. Students might encounter cyberbullying, trolling, or harassment that affects their well-being or ability to feel safe on campus.

Seung Whan Ryu, SHRM-CP, winner of the SHRM Foundation’s 2024 Student Chapter Advisor Impact Award, offered the following tips for practicing civility. Ryu is an assistant professor of management at Sacred Heart University’s Jack Welch College of Business & Technology in Fairfield, Conn.

Ryu’s recommendations:

  • Acknowledge differences.
    “College campuses are melting pots of cultures, backgrounds, lifestyles, and perspectives,” he said. “Acknowledging that others are different from you—and that this diversity makes our world colorful and beautiful—is the first step toward practicing civility.”

  • Practice active listening. Ask questions and show genuine interest in the other person’s perspective.
    “This not only enriches your understanding but also fosters an environment of mutual respect and inclusivity,” Ryu said.

  • Embrace your vulnerability.
    “It often feels like everyone else has everything figured out. However, that’s rarely the case—most people are still figuring things out! It’s OK to be vulnerable and share your feelings honestly, which can foster deeper connections and mutual understanding,” Ryu said.

    For example, if you’re struggling with a project you’re working on with another student, have an open conversation with your project partner without placing blame or being defensive. Try saying: “I’m feeling overwhelmed with this project. Can we discuss how we can better collaborate?”

    “Being open about your uncertainties and challenges can lead to more supportive and collaborative relationships, as others will likely feel the same way and appreciate your honesty,” Ryu said.

  • Recognize your role as a bystander.
    “When you witness incivility, you have the power to make a difference,” Ryu said. An active bystander is someone who is aware of the surrounding dynamics and takes responsibility for contributing to a positive environment. If you feel safe doing so, speak up or offer support to the person being treated unfairly.

    Sometimes, a simple act of kindness or an encouraging word can make a significant impact.

    “Small actions, like asking someone who looks down if they are OK, or larger interventions, like reporting incivility, can help create a culture of respect and support on campus,” he said.
    ly, the university noted, “civility is treating others as we would like to be treated.”

Also, consider checking to see if your college or university has a code of conduct.

The University of Maryland Global Campus, for example, has a “Code of Civility” that promotes a collegial atmosphere for students, faculty, and staff through courteous behavior such as refraining from making profane, insulting, or other disparaging remarks to and about others.

The University of Tennessee, Knoxville, adopted its “Principles of Civility and Community” in 2011. Among its precepts is encouraging everyone in its community to speak out about behavior “involving bigotry and other types of incivility” so the university can respond in a fair, timely, and consistent manner.

Ultimately, the university noted, “civility is treating others as we would like to be treated.”

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